About Me

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Ottawa, Canada
Dr. Charles Lam has since 1971 received training in West Germany (telecom) and university education in U.K. (management) and acquired working experiences in Hong Kong and Canada, in a utility company, Hong Kong Government, a multinational organization and a SME. In his career path, he has acquired qualifications from UK institutions including DBA (1990), MBA (1980) and Chartered Engineer (1978). Since 1986, he has left pure engineering to teaching various subjects of business management in Hong Kong for famous universities of Hong Kong, England and United States. He also has served the society as a member of an advisory committee of the Hong Kong Government for eight years, and as the Hon. Chairman of its Consumer Education Group. Later, he set up his own company to offer services as a consultant, writer and speaker. In his 'Second Half Time', he has been working passionately on integrating Christian values with management knowledge, in the marketplace/workplace ministry, serving hospitals, churches and organizations, as a speaker, consultant, life coach, and the leader of a REST Group based on a life story approach. Charles is currently living with his wife in Canada.

Thursday, January 07, 2010

Life coaching: love if not appreciated becomes a nuisance


A man’s daughter and her boyfriend want to ride a boat to explore the sea. But they do not know that the boat is in a poor condition and that they are not well prepared for the sea which could become rough any time.
The father tells the daughter and her boyfriend to check the boat carefully first and to make adequate preparations for facing uncertainties. “At least, make sure that the navigation system is working properly”, the father says. The lovers are irritated as they see that their joy and excitement are being quenched. She tells her father, “We do not fear, because we know God will protect and guide us.”
The father, who has gone through rough seas in his life, speaks again out of love, “I am not against your plan to ride together, but don’t you think you are making an important decision too quickly, out of emotion?” She answers, “We can decide for ourselves and know our timing best.” The lovers then ignore the father and start to pack for their journey meaningful to them.
I hope that the above story will develop in a way the three persons and God are happy with.
As a reader, you may appreciate the difficulty in facing similar conflicts—a child shouts loudly at her mother : “you don’t love me!” when she can’t eat as much chocolates as she wants; a teenager quarrels or even fights with his parent because he is not allowed to play his computer games before finishing his homework; etc. Love-driven guidance is often seen as a barrier to their freedoms.
By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures. A wise man has great power, and a man of knowledge increases strength; for waging war you need guidance, and for victory many advisers. (Prov. 24:3-6). However, life coaching will be difficult if the parties involved do not view the ‘coaching-coached’ relationship the same way.
Jesus says, "If you hold to My teaching, you are really My disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free" (John 8:31-32). It is my hope that persons involved in a coaching process is based on such truth, or else, love could be seen as a nuisance.
Written by Charles
twitter : twitter.com/charles155

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